Tuesday, November 6, 2012

Report Cards.. Ouch..


I have been debating posting something about this, but I need to get it off my chest.  My oldest son is in third grade and my youngest is in first.  Their first report cards of this year were not the best.  Sure, while everyone celebrates their children here are mine with mediocre report cards :/  I have been thinking long and hard about how to approach this with them.  They know that making good grades is important to me and they know that they need to do well in school if they are going to grow up to be successful and to do what they want to do with their lives.  When I got their report cards last week I was in complete shock.  Their progress reports mid-semester came back fine, nothing out of the ordinary, in fact, making steady progress!  So why does the report card come out and say otherwise? 

I see their work come out of their book bags every day and I check everything over.  I speak to them about what they did and what they could have done better.  I always encourage them to do the best they can and if something looks like crap I crumble it up and make them do it again.  I feel that I take an active role in helping them with their homework, but maybe I could have done more. 

Of course, I think I can confide in my mother and share this situation with her and immediately it’s my fault.  It’s my fault because I CHOSE to get a divorce and I CHOSE to agree to the custody situation that I agreed to, which left the kids half the time with their father.  I’m sorry, but I know a handful of people who grew up in broken homes and they turned out to be JUST FINE..  Plus… I don’t consider my home broken at all.  Sure… I’m not with the boys’ father, but my house is very complete, loving, and caring.  Sure.. I’m not able to control what goes on at their father’s house, but I do know that from asking the kids, he does look over their homework and has to sign off on it every night, so he’s at least doing the minimal.  Anyway.. I cannot believe I have do deal with her ignorant accusations.

The main problem at hand is that I their report cards weren’t great and I know we need to somehow do more.  I cannot remember being back in first grade, but I can remember my oldest son being in first grade and all of the kids in that class had terrible handwriting.  Since Christian’s lowest marks were in handwriting and writing understandably, am I wrong to print out pages for him to trace letters and numbers and make him complete the same sheet over and over every single night until his handwriting improves? I don’t want to be too hard on him but I’m not going to have him bring home another report hard with an “N” in handwriting!  I might make the older one do it too just to improve his too.   Dang.. and I remember  growing up in grade school, the boys in my class ALWAYS had terrible handwriting.  
 
I also know I wasn't a Straight A student by any means. I worked hard and my parents encouraged me the best the could and I got in trouble if I brought home anything under a C... but it happened...  In fact, I was terrible at reading comprehension in elementary school. I was even worse at math!! I did better in math in college than I ever did in earlier school.  Thankfully Austin is a whiz at math and that is his strong subject.  He had great teachers in kindergarten and first grade which I think propelled him in a good direction.  I'm worried about Christian though. He is not as sharp as his math as Austin was in first grade and I know that's bad to compare kids, but I am not sure he got the same boost that he desperately needed. They both had the same kindergarten teacher, but not first.

I refuse to believe having had a divorce almost four years ago and having successful report cards since then – has anything to do with them having “Not so good” report cards this time around.  It just means I have to work harder and try to encourage them the best I can.  Anyway…  I just really want what’s best for them in life.. I want them to have it easier than me and I want them to not let anything get in the way of their success like I did.  Hard example to set for them when their father didn’t even finish high school and makes 4x more than me.  What a jerk.  I wonder if it’s too late for me to take up the air conditioning trade.  Sure I would crawl around sweaty in an attic to quadruple my pay.